What The Fuck Should I Do Tonight: Halloween Weekend Edition!

Good Morrow to YOU, Fine Humans! It’s that most wonderful time of the year, that’s right it’s the original High Holy Candy Holiday itself, Halloween! Best day evahhhhh!

Nothing matters anymore in Trump's America, even the ghouls have had it. 

Nothing matters anymore in Trump's America, even the ghouls have had it. 

I’ve already completed many of my annual Halloween Rituals. I’ve finished two bags of candy corn all by myself (clean plate club represent!), I’ve finished my annual Buffy Rewatch, though I will say that this year I just started in season 5 because I think last year I only made it to season 4 before just skipping to the musical and then the finale, because the Powers That Be (Angel references, I do them) decided to pull Buffy from Netflix and I spent months literally berating a friend into giving me her hulu password so I could watch it there. I have watched my favorite spooky movie, the hilarious and legit scary Gilda Radner/Gene Wilder classic Haunted Honeymoon, and I’ve almost completed construction on my costume, which this year required a few evenings out in the woods collecting treasures from the forest floor to use in my ceremonial crown.  AND I’ve finished preparations for my terrifying ILLUMINATI BALL decorations for Empire on Saturday. I really, really like Halloween and I wish I could spend the whole friggin’ year doing Halloween shit. Does that job exist? I want that job.

There is no dance number in a horror movie greater than Dom and Gilda's in  Haunted Honeymoon .

There is no dance number in a horror movie greater than Dom and Gilda's in Haunted Honeymoon.

This year, I have a Seattle friend in town to join me on weekend escapades, and I’m pretty psyched about it, but I don't have a lot of time to write, unfortunately. So let’s get to it and catalog all the Halloween shit going on this weekend. Ready? Let’s go.

Friday October 27

Knack Factory starts the weekend strong with their Mortality Sucks Halloween Party with music sets from Mosart212, Sea Level, Don Damiani and GabeFM. Donations accepted at the door for We Speak About It.

Live at 212 is having a Halloween Hellfire Bash with Culling the Herd, Travel Amygdala, Destination: Void, Stillborn Condition and Weapons at Hand.

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Plague has a themed edition with An Infernal Halloween.Covered in Bees offer up a Halloween Spooktacular at Empire.   

Space has jazz ensemble Frank Carlberg and Dreams, Hallucinations & Nightmares.

Glenn Jones and Micah Blue Smaldone are at Apohadion.

Whale Oil and Friends are at Oxbow - this is Whale Oil’s last show, as core member Brian Saxton is moving away. Pretty Sad and JUG open, and there are rumored to be many “special guests.” Love and luck, Brian.  


Fat Knuckle Freddy, Clara Junken and Mean Mugg are at PHOME for Fat Knuckle Freddy’s album release party. .

Dub Apocalypse and Raging Brass Reggae are at Bayside Bowl.

Leash, Curse, H.L. and HazelKrust are at Geno’s.

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Amos Lee is at State Theatre with Mutlu but it’s sold out, so trick or treat to you, music lover.

Andrew Bailie is at Blue with

Danny and Jake have their 4th Friday at Rhum.

Saturday October 28

A thing I’m involved in is throwing The ILLUMINATI BALL II at Empire, this year with Vapors of Morphine (Dana and Jerome from Morphine doing the music of Morphine and new compositions) and SeepeopleS. It's a masquerade ball, so come fancy and doing your best Eyes Wide Shut thing, but like, without all the naked people. 

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SPACE has its annual Halloween party, this year with Sunset Hearts as The Cure, members of Superorder and Contrapposto and others as Cocteau Twins, The Psychic Dicks as Siouxsie and the Banshees and The Blood Caps as The Replacements.

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Brain Boru has a Halloween Fairy Tale Ball with DJs.

Dean Ford has his Purple Brainz Halloween Prince tribute at Port City Music Hall.

Hessian, Problem with Dragons and Drivetrain are doing a Halloween Bash at Geno’s.

Hella Good Tacos gets in on the Halloween game with their Hellaween party featuring Cryptid, Combatant, Eyeball, Fletcher Brothers Band and Uncle Spudd.



Harmolodic String Project plays brunch at Local Sprouts starting at 10am.

Jaw Gems, God.Damn.Chan., Altered Gee and Just Plain Jones are at Bunker Brewing.

Blue has jazz.


Josh Ritter, The Royal City Band and Good Old War are at the State Theatre.

REKS and Ben Shorr are at Bayside Bowl.

80’s/90’s cover band The Awesome are at PHOME.

Martin Sexton is at Aura.

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Sunday October 29

Morricone Youth and Selbyville are at Apohadion performing songs inspired by Dracula.

LQH is performing Thriller (the album, not the dance) at Empire.

OK dorks, have the SPPPOOOOOOKKKIEST of weekends and please, this weekend, watch out for all the kiddos out, and leave the toy guns and toy weapons at home or mark them clearly so we all know they're safe. And be safe yourself! Watch out for each other and don't drink and drive, and please be mindful that what was scary last year could be really triggering this year. So be careful and caring with people. OK. I leave you with this, so loooonnnnnggg SUCKAZ!