Welcome to a new semi-regular column wherein our favorite local musical luminaries answer 3 absurd questions and two questions about their band and then we read it, lean back in our chairs, absent-mindedly scratch our chins, smile as we stare off into the ether and say to ourselves, "this friggin' guy... I should go see his/her band some time. I mean, s/he is just so charming... friggin' A." Then we take a swig of our cold domestic beer in a can, chuckle greasily out of the side of our mouth like Ben Affleck in Chasing Amy, and get on with our day.
Oh, also I will provide very poorly photoshopped images of their faces for your entertainment as well. Right.
So without further ado, I bring you....
This Friggin' Guy: With Kevin "Boo" Leavitt!
Hello Kevin, thank you for being my inaugural victim for my new interview column thingie. You have done many interviews, and answered many questions in your day. You have appeared on both stage and screen! Why, isn’t it true that just recently you paired a jaunty high-collared cape with camo shorts on channel 6 to play some musical songs for the unwashed masses. FASHION! You also have an album release show coming up at Geno's on November 28th. I don’t think it would be a stretch to say that you have many irons in the fire, creatively. I think we’re all anxious to dredge the sediment at the bottom of your brain, but before we begin - we all know you’re the lead singer of Covered in Bees, Portland’s greatest death punk band, an honor you share with The Brothers Porter (Doug on guitar and Ed on bass) and Tristan Gallagher on drums; what other interesting projects are you working on right now?
I do a podcast with my wife called MUNJOY DIVISION, we are about to release episode 50. That is super fun. The Bees are writing our next record, working title DIRIGO DARKNESS. I would love to have that out this time next year. We have a song on the upcoming Troma film Return to Nuke Em High Volume 2.
Ok jerks, I put links in there so you guys can all go check that shit out. Capisce? Now let's get to the questions.
Question One: If each day of the week were a song, what song would each day be?
Sunday: Crash Test Dummies - Androgynous
Monday: Skankin' Pickle - I'm In Love With A Girl Named Spike
Tuesday: Green Dreams - Bug Sex
Wednesday: Morrissey - Hairdresser on Fire
Thursday: Dixie Chicks - Long Time Gone
Friday: Turbonegro - I Got a Knife
Saturday: GIUDA - Number 10
Question Two: You can choose only one food for your diet for the next year: Soylent Green or the cockroach jelly bars from Snowpiercer?
Bug-bars or people-pops? I am intrigued by the idea of a people chow product. My cats have been eating the same kibble for years and they are stoked on it. I am never half as stoked about what I am eating compared to my cats. I’ve tried it, it’s not very good. But they LOVE IT.
Question Three: Why is there something rather than nothing?
There is no spoon.
Question Four: Covered in Bees have been making death punk for 12 years and you guys love to tell a spoooooky tale! Tell us the story of the scariest thing that has happened to the band.
The bathroom at Prime Artists Rehearsal Studio.
Question Five: Why should someone go out and buy a copy of Covered in Bees’ brand new album/musical radio drama Corpse in the Mattress Motor Lodge - and where can they get it?
Here is what i hope happens. You purchase or steal a copy of our new CD, Corpse in the Mattress Motor Lodge. You burn it to your iTunes, listen to it once and throw the CD in a box. The box is eventually moved to your closet, then to your attic. 8 years later (give or take) while spring cleaning, you donate the entire box to a charitable thrift shop. After eons sitting on a shelf, the CD is purchased ironically by a MECA student who is ironically using lasers and compact discs to create a art-installation commenting on the fact that Portland is technically no longer a municipality, but the world’s biggest sports bar. While visiting his/her parents for Thanksgiving, the art student’s younger adopted robot sibling, who is very shy and a victim of bullying because they are a robot, finds the Covered in Bees CD. After waiting 6 hours for their 3-D printer to make something that can play the compact disc, the little robot listens to the album and is filled with hope. The little adopted robot is overcome with peace, because if a fat no-talent monster can embarrass himself like that on that CD, there is no reason that little adopted robot cannot stand tall and be exactly who they have always dreamed of being. That is why you should buy or steal our new CD.